Showing posts with label FUNNY LINES INDIA. Show all posts
Showing posts with label FUNNY LINES INDIA. Show all posts

Thursday, October 27, 2016

India's Top-Rank Sports!

India's Top-Rank Sports...and Pastimes!

If ever there were a people who have everything needed to succeed, it's us. If ever there were a people who need to be saved from themselves, it's us.'
'From A 'New India' Novel, Dreams of One Country (Amazon - Books): India Rises! An amazing young woman's campaign for Humaneness-Honesty ushers India's New Dawn.

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None to beat cricket, but two other all-too popular sports - though without the benefit of any organized high publicity competitions like the IPL - are Showing Off and Hoodwinking others for profit (or Swindling). Hope they start big money competitions like ISOL and IHL!!!

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Monday, October 10, 2016

India's Worthiest Citizens Today!

'If ever there were a people who have everything needed to succeed, it's us. If ever there were a people who need to be saved from themselves, it's us.'
'From A 'New India' Novel, Dreams of One Country (Amazon - Books): India Rises! An amazing young woman's campaign for Humaneness-Honesty ushers India's New Dawn.

India's Worthiest Citizens Today!

No Indian who does not have a mobile phone, an all-purpose (though it's still not edible!) phone, to tap-tap on while walking around on the street is a worthy citizen of the country.
No Indian who has less cars than his neighbor is a worthy citizen of the country.
No Indian who has less high-breed dogs than his neighbor is a worthy citizen of the country.
No Indian who is not on Facebook is a worthy citizen of the country.
No Indian who doesn't have a new unbreakable-glass modern-day palace to live in is a worthy citizen of this country.

That makes it abundantly clear who are India's Worthiest Citizens Today! Right?

But what about all those people who have an ordinary mobile phone bought with money borrowed from a loan shark, who have no cars or breed dogs, who call a shanty-town hut their home...whose main worry is about their family's next meal?   
Oh, those! Totally unworthy...not worth wasting your time thinking about. Forget them! In fact, as far as all Worthy Indians are concerned, they don't exist!

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Thursday, October 6, 2016

India's Self-Geniused Executives!

'If ever there were a people who have everything needed to succeed, it's us. If ever there were a people who need to be saved from themselves, it's us.'
'From A 'New India' Novel, Dreams of One Country (Amazon - Books): India Rises! An amazing young woman's campaign for Humaneness-Honesty ushers India's New Dawn.

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India's Self-Geniused Executives!

A less public aspect of the craving to show-off or brag are India's self-geniused company executives. Young executives create an air of being geniuses by techniques like ill-treating or insulting subordinates and treating colleagues as nitwits. At the same they grab good ideas they hear from a colleague, run to senior officers and present the ideas as their own before the colleague gets a chance. I have already described an example of such genius cheats in Buffalo's Rumpanathan and Mr Sneeze.
It's very difficult for colleagues to have any discussions with these geniuses...who are so preoccupied with geniotic thinking that they tend to look through ordinary colleagues. These Indian-style cheats are also expert tale-carriers. Colleagues have to be careful what they say in their hearing because the geniuses will run to the senior officer and add some masala to make it seem the junior was insulting the boss. If the senior is from a developed country he does not understand what the Indian genius is up to, because such crookery does not happen in civilized countries and he assumes the genius airs put on by the junior are indeed signs of the young man's brilliance.

Another aspect of the aerial Indian executive is the founder/head of a successful company. As his company rises higher he himself rises into a more and more rarefied atmosphere, where he can be accessed only by other company heads... or the Hubble Telescope...or, maybe, the gods!

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Monday, August 29, 2016

Sadly, no Self-Lifting in Rio Olympics


Sadly, no Self-Lifting in Rio Olympics

Self-Lifting, sadly, has not yet been added on as an Olympic Sport. Not at Rio anyway. But whenever that happens, it will mean a guaranteed Gold, possibly even Silver and Bronze, for some of India's showing-off and bragging champions!

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Saturday, August 20, 2016

Specialist CWashers and DWalkers

Specialist CWashers and DWalkers

In the showing-off game of those have the means in India the morning begins with the carwashing ceremony. Their cars come out of the garages on to the road for display. Specialist carwashers arrive and give the cars a thorough wash, often better than the car owners bathe themselves. Meanwhile specialist dog walkers arrive to take the show-offers' high breed dogs for a display walk...in which they freely dirty up the neighborhood. Things that can't be done in countries like America. You can't get paid car-washers or dog-walkers. And you can't miss the warning signs. You're expected to carry a scoop and container and take your dog's byproducts home for disposal. Which only proves how free this country is! Not only breed dogs but homeless dogs and destitute humans (whom no one else cares about) can freely use any public space to relieve themselves.

Whoops! Isn't that the ultimate in freedom?


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Tuesday, March 22, 2016

India-Made Illusions 3: QualityTest

India-Made Illusions 3: QualityTest

That differentiating citizens as superior or inferior by caste in no way hinders India from becoming one of the most developed nations. No! Citizens are equal in developed countries like Denmark. This is a huge hurdle on our road to progress. Caste divisions are strong in villages. Even in cities there is a tacit acceptance of caste, specially when it comes to marriage. People's thinking must modernize for India to rise. 

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To discover a new India where people come together as one to build a an enlightened nation - an India that could have been and still can be - journey through Dreams of One Country (Amazon Books).

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Monday, March 21, 2016

India-Made Illusions 2: Dimocracy

India-Made Illusions 2: Dimocracy


That opting for Democracy and giving all citizens the right to vote makes a country a Democracy. No! What matters is what happens there in every day reality. A real Democracy is committed to defend the 'life and liberty' of every citizen without exception - including the poorest and weakest.

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To discover a new India whose people rise to build a true Democracy - an India that could have been built and still can be - journey through Dreams of One Country (Amazon Books).

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Sunday, March 20, 2016

India-Made Illusions 1: Corruptdom

India-Made Illusions 1: Corruptdom

C for corruption. That India will soon become a developed country - without rooting out the systemic corruption, from cops on the street to high officialdom.
The happiest country in the world today is the one that's most developed: Denmark. India lags way behind in development and on the happiness meter.

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To discover a new India whose people rise against corruption to build the country on talent - an India that could have been built and still can be - journey through Dreams of One Country (Amazon).

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Friday, March 4, 2016

Free India ki Lambi Kahani

Free India ki Lambi Kahani!

The major  problem in developing India to the level of the world's best-developed nations is India's divided heart. That obstacle was partly overcome during the freedom struggle. But once we revelled in freedom the country returned to the same state.
What divides India's heart? It's a state of mind (among many folk, not all) that necessitates looking down on other Indians - by money-worth (today it's showing-off houses, foreign cars, breed dogs, gold jewellery, clothes, mobiles etc., particularly in neighbourhoods), as well as language, region, religion, caste and other immature reasons. A compulsion that splinters India's heart into bits and continues to waste time in India rising to her true talent potential
 
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India's destiny unveiled - on Amazon!
Revolutionary Theme: A story to inspire India, Dreams of One Country is about a beautiful and amazing young woman who leads the country's transformation into a truly modern and enlightened nation. Download from Amazon.com on any device - like I-phone, pad or computer.
For a quick preview click here: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00EMOAMQM and then on the http which appears, and next on the book's cover picture.
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Facing India Realities!

Facing India Realities!

It's a mystery indeed! What does India want? What do her people want? Today? Tomorrow?  Do they want a state of Endless Turmoil? Or Peace and Real Development by wisely channeling their talents. How many of them have an idea of what a really developed country is? How many of them think of India's tomorrow? Can drifting from day to day on the whims of every day pettiness lift any country to the heights?

To seek world stardom India needs a bond of basic humanity to unite the people. No country whose people do not come together as 'one country' can become a truly developed society.
 
 
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India's destiny unveiled - on Amazon!
Revolutionary Theme: A story to inspire India, Dreams of One Country is about a beautiful and amazing young woman who leads the country's transformation into a truly modern and enlightened nation. Download from Amazon.com on any device - like I-phone, pad or computer.
For a quick preview click here: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00EMOAMQM and then on the http which appears, and next on the book's cover picture.
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India Must Rise!

India Must Rise!


No amount of pretending to be developed, no self-praise, no bragging, no propaganda - without doing hard, well-planned, long-term work at the ground level to change old conditions and attitudes - can lift a country to the heights.

India Must Rise on her Talents...by Aiming High!
 
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India's destiny unveiled - on Amazon!
Revolutionary Theme: A story to inspire India, Dreams of One Country is about a beautiful and amazing young woman who leads the country's transformation into a truly modern and enlightened nation. Download from Amazon.com on any device - like I-phone, pad or computer.
For a quick preview click here: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00EMOAMQM and then on the http which appears, and next on the book's cover picture.
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Wednesday, February 24, 2016

Why SeaLevels, Meanness Rise!

 Why SeaLevels, Meanness Rise!


The world's sea levels are rising due to global warming.

And the world's meanness levels are rising due to frozen mindsets.

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India's destiny unveiled - on Amazon!
Revolutionary Theme: A story to inspire India, Dreams of One Country is about a beautiful and amazing young woman who leads the country's transformation into a truly modern and enlightened nation. Download from Amazon.com on any device - like I-phone, pad or computer.
For a quick preview click here: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00EMOAMQM and then on the http which appears, and next on the book's cover picture.
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Thursday, January 21, 2016

India BigShot 1: Billionaire!


India BigShot 1: Billionaire!

This is a true story. It proves that the easy way to become a billionaire in India is to Undo India. 
If you met the man in the early days you would notice that all he had was one tablet-making machine. To demonstrate his clout he would surely take you to the Drug Controller's Office. From the gate and up the steps of 4 or 5 storeys every staff member you passed would salute him. In his office the Drug Controller would stand up to greet him - like a long-lost brother.
If you gave it a thought and checked up (as I did...before I quit after a brief stint as his new product advisor), you would understand the nature of the business. The man bribed everyone from watchman up at the Drug Controller's Office. And with the Controller's approval he bought up poor quality or spurious drugs from other shady operators and supplied them to the government and municipal hospitals in the state.   
From that auspicious (ho! ha!) beginning the man built a drug company. Today he's a billionaire, looking for green pastures in the West.

Does that man ever stop to think how many lives or how many families he hurt or destroyed by supplying spurious drugs?

He rose by Undoing India. 

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India's destiny unveiled - on Amazon!
Revolutionary Theme: A story to inspire India, Dreams of One Country is about a beautiful and amazing young woman who leads the country's transformation into a truly modern and enlightened nation. Download from Amazon.com on any device - like I-phone, pad or computer.
For a quick preview click here: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00EMOAMQM and then on the http which appears, and next on the book's cover picture.
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Tuesday, January 19, 2016

India's Second Everest!


INDIA'S SECOND EVEREST!



Yes, India has a second world-beater peak. Indeed, it's a physical peak - the Everest of showing-off. Before it showing-off cars (3-car owners looking down on 2-car owners; 2-car owners looking down on 1-car owners; everyone looking down on no-car owners), foreign brand clothes, breed dogs etc. to each other in the neighbourhood is nothing. It's a single family home that rises 25-stories on a Mumbai landmark, making it eligible for entry in the Guinness Book of Records.


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Monday, January 18, 2016

Modern India Rope-Trick!!?

Modern India Rope-Trick!!?

How many times since Independence has an international agency, recognizing India''s talent potential, predicted that in the next ten to twenty years she would be the fastest developing country?

When will the people realize that only a just and caring society (not pretensions and showing-off; not propaganda and self-promotion) which upholds the basic ideas of humanity for all her people can become truly developed?
There's no easy Rope-Trick Climb to Development.
Failure to learn historic lessons makes it difficult for India to rise much higher than her  135th rank among 185 countries in the Human Development Index rating of UNDP. Obviously, growing economic or military power is not enough. That is why Russia, yesterday’s superpower and the first country to send a manned satellite into space (Yuri Gagarin in the first Sputnik) still remains a developing BRIC.

It's left to us to decide how long we want to remain a BRIC.


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Sunday, January 10, 2016

India's Flying Draincovers!

India's Flying Draincovers!

Where my son lives in the US five 2-storey houses make a circle. And there's a common circular driveway. A drain manhole there has a heavy cast iron cover which says Made in India.
How did India-made draincovers fly West? What spurred exports? Well, it's a curious story. A Mystery. As well as History.
Under British rule the police were under English officers. Every city had cast iron covers over the manholes of drains. Then came Independence. British rule ended and the English left the country. The dawn of freedom. Soon the iron draincovers started vanishing, leaving gaping holes. When replaced they vanished again in a day or two. Slum-dwellers and other poor carried them away and sold them. People died stumbling into the holes in the dark or in rains.

A strange fact is that though Indians differ in language, clothes and  customs, the basic attitudes are similar across the country. So in city after city the draincovers vanished. And state after state decided to give up iron draincovers and use concrete covers instead.
The result was that the iron-cover manufacturers were hard-hit. Their manufacturing facilities fell silent. With no hope of getting business, they realized there was only one way to survive. They would have to explore and find an export market.

So...we must be ever-thankful to the draincover thieves for spurring unforeseen exports for the country.

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Thursday, December 31, 2015

Your Winter's Sunny HeartWarmer

Your Winter's Sunny HeartWarmer


I wish A Most Happy New Year to all brave explorers wandering in Bloggyland!

On such chilly days you surely need a sunny heartwarmer - no less than a bodywarmer. But please don't overload on Scotch, rum etc. The side-effects may prove to be your year's biggest headache.

To be sure of highly beneficial effects only you can do no better than download Dreams of One Country by Jagjit Daniel (and John) from Amazon.com. A preview? Click here: www.amazon.com/dp/B00EMOAMQM and then on the book's cover picture. In this panoramic history-based novel you will discover a heartwarming love story.......which inspires a virtual miracle: the heart-warming people's March to a united Ek Desh India...to begin building a truly modern and enlightened country. A Century 21st nation!

Yes, it's left to each of us to help make those Dreams come true.

So here's wishing you all A Warmhearted Year too! 

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